Developing Emotional Awareness

"I don't know what came over me."

"I'm just stressed."

Emotional awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence; if you don't know what you're feeling, then it's impossible to manage it successfully.

People with strong emotional awareness can easily articulate their emotions verbally or in writing. They tend to be closely in touch with their body's distress signals and feel comfortable making "gut" decisions. They are still vulnerable to emotional triggers, but they have a good sense of what those triggers are and manage them accordingly.

A lack of emotional awareness can be crippling at work. Without this skill, you could find yourself blindsided by your emotional responses or not realize the severity of a negative situation. People with this competency gap often have difficulty making decisions or setting specific goals, because nothing "feels" right.

Emotional awareness can be developed and deepened with practice. Here are some tips to help you develop your emotional awareness:

• Keep an emotion journal. Several times a day, write down all of the emotions you are feeling in as much detail as possible. Describe how your body is responding. Is your heart rate accelerated? Do you have any pain or tension in specific areas?
  
• Set aside time every day for reflection, meditation, or prayer. Exercise such as yoga or running can help you focus your thoughts and connect with your body.
• Mentally revisit a time when you felt stressed or angry at work. Carefully evaluate the emotions you felt at the time. Which ones were the strongest? Were they appropriate to what was actually going on around you, or was your response based on something else?

When you write or talk about your emotions, avoid words like "angry," "happy," or - the most overused emotional word of all time - "stressed." Stress is not an emotion; it is the brownish-gray color that comes when you mix multiple colors from a set of paints. Look at the emotions that make up your stress for a better understanding of how they fit together. To help you get started, here is a list of 120 emotions:

Afraid, Agitated, Alienated, Amazed, Amused, Annoyed, Anxious, Apathetic, Appreciative, Apprehensive, Bewildered, Bitter, Blissful, Bored, Cheerful, Collected, Comfortable,Confident,Conflicted, Confused, Content, Courageous, Curious, Defeated, Defensive, Defiant, Deflated, Dejected, Delighted, Despondent, Determined, Disappointed, Discouraged, Disgusted, Disillusioned, Disoriented, Distracted, Distressed, Eager, Ecstatic, Elated, Embarrassed, Empty, Energetic, Enraged, Entertained, Enthusiastic, Excited, Exhausted, Exuberant, Fascinated, Forlorn, Frantic, Frustrated, Giddy, Greedy, Grieving, Guilty, Hateful, Helpless, Hopeful, Horrified, Hostile, Humiliated, Hurt, Impatient, Incensed, Incredulous, Indecisive, Indifferent, Indignant, Insecure, Inspired, Intimidated, Irritable, Jealous, Jovial, Jubilant, Liberated, Lonely,Lost, Lustful, Melancholy, Mellow, Numb, Offended, Outraged, Panicked, Passionate, Peaceful, Pensive, Pessimistic, Playful, Pleased, Proud, Regretful, Relaxed, Relieved, Remorseful, Resentful, Satisfied, Schadenfreude, Secure, Self-pitying, Skeptical, Smug, Somber, Spiteful, Suspicious, Sympathetic, Terrified, Thankful, Thrilled, Tired, Troubled, Uncertain, Uncomfortable, Worried, Wounded, Yearning

If I missed any, please feel welcome to post them as comments. Cheers!